Teenagers often see sleepovers as part of a ‘normal’ childhood. Children talk about them with excitement: popcorn, late-night chatter, and whisper secrets under blankets. Many of us remember our own sleepovers with fondness, too, but are sleepovers really as harmless as they seem?
The fun and the hidden risks
The moment children stay overnight at someone else’s home, parents lose a great deal of agency. Every household has its own rules about food, bedtime, screen use, and discipline. For a child, less supervision often means late nights, poor sleep, exposure to inappropriate media, or even unhealthy peer pressure. What looks like “harmless fun” can sometimes leave behind worries or habits that show up much later.
What research reminds us
Many parents tell me something along the lines of, "I went on sleepovers and turned out fine." I always remind parents that personal anecdotes cannot be the only metric for assessing risk. Times have also changed, and so have risks. Research shows that children rarely sleep well when away from home. Even losing two or three hours of good sleep can affect mood, immunity, and school performance.
A 2020 report by Common Sense Media revealed something worrying: one in four children said their first experience of being bullied or humiliated happened during a sleepover. What some children remember as “funny pranks,” others carry as painful memories. Many young people report that they first came across explicit or disturbing material not at home, but during unsupervised group settings like sleepovers. Ergo, while the laughter is real, research shows that the hidden costs are real too.
Do sleepovers build friendships?
One common argument is that sleepovers help children bond. And it is true, spending extra time together strengthens friendships. But do they have to bond overnight?
Child development studies tell us children build deep connections through teamwork, games, sports, creative clubs, and playdates. In Japan, overnight stays usually happen at schools under trained supervision. In Scandinavian countries, its nature camps with structured guidance. Friendship doesn’t require risk. Children can bond just as well, and sometimes more meaningfully, through safe, supervised activities.
Healthier alternatives
Saying no to sleepovers doesn’t mean saying no to fun. Parents can offer other options that give children the same joy without the risks:
Late-night playdates
Children can watch a movie, eat snacks, and play till 9 p.m. or 10 p.m., then head home for proper rest.
Supervised group events
Camping trips, movie nights, or school retreats allow for bonding in a safe, structured way.
Family-based overnights
Staying with cousins or trusted relatives gives the same excitement but within familiar boundaries and values.
As an educator, I believe traditions should be revisited regularly in light of children’s well-being. Sleepovers are not categorically “bad” in themselves, but they carry risks that cannot be ignored.
Tradition alone should not decide what is right for our children. Our choices should be guided by what protects them today and prepares them for a better and more secure tomorrow.
Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this section are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the position or editorial policy of Pakistan TV Digital.
The writer, an educationist with over 26 years of experience, is the founder of P.E.A.K.S School, Islamabad.
